For some reason I was extra tired today. I used to blame my circumstances or suspect some sort of physiological reason behind the tiredness. “Something that I can’t control must me be making it hard to get things done, so I’ll just excuse myself from work.” Not completely dismissing the long, labor-intensive hours of having two small children and a husband doing both school and work full time, I also had to acknowledge a greater root issue: I was full of excuses and not taking ownership of my situation.
It seems there are three general responses to our situations: “It’s hard, I can’t get it done, I’ll just ignore it,” “I’ll do my best with what I have, knowing that I can’t finish all of it but doing what I can,” or “I’m exhausted and I haven’t slept since Tuesday, but my house is clean!” These are exaggerations, of course. I would never accuse someone else of misplacing her priorities, but I am forced to take an honest look at mine.
I have a friend who comes over on a weekly basis to play with my kids so I can rest, clean, run errands, or whatever is the most pressing issue of that day. Today I found myself using this as an excuse. “The kids woke up way too early, maybe I’ll run through my list when Tammy gets here.”
But the thing about a routine is that it is supposed to be a routine. The things we do every day that come more natural as time goes on, until eventually we do it without thinking. Nobody hires a babysitter so they can brush their teeth or take a shower (though it’s tempting at times), because they find a way to get it done. It’s part of the routine. So I pushed through the routine (reluctantly, but increasingly natural as the days go on) and now I can use today’s time to work ahead in my kitchen.